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steal this book by abbie hoffman dedicated to jerry lefcourt lawyer and brother library of congress number 72-157115 stolen from library of congress copyright ©1971 pirate editions

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table of discontents · · · introduction aiding and abetting survive 1 free food oooooo restaurants food programs supermarkets wholesale markets food conspiracies cheap chow 2 free clothing and furniture o o o free clothing sandals free furniture 3 free transportation oooooo hitch-hiking freighting cars buses airlines in city travel 4 free land 5 free housing oooo communes urban living rural living list of communes 6 free education o list of free universities

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7 free medical care o o o birth control clinics abortions diseases treated free 8 free communication oooooo press conference wall painting use of the flag radio free telephones pay phones 9 free play o o movies and concerts records and books 10 free money ooooo welfare unemployment panhandling rip-offs the international yippie currency exchange 11 free dope o o buying selling and giving it away growing your own 12 assorted freebies ooooooooooo laundry pets posters security postage maps ministry attrocities veteran s benefits watch vacations

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· drinks burials astrodome pictures diploma toilets fight ooooo 1 tell it all brothers and sisters ooooooo starting a printing workshop underground newspapers high school papers g.i papers news services the underground press switchboards 2 guerrilla broadcasting o o guerrilla radio guerrilla television 3 demonstrations ooooo dress helmets gas masks walkie-talkies other equipment 4 trashing oooo weapons for street fighting knife fighting unarmed defense general strategy rep 5 people s chemistry ooooooo stink bomb smoke bomb cbw molotov cocktail sterno bomb aerosol bomb pipe bombs

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o general bomb strategy 6 first aid for street fighters o o what to do medical committees 7 hip-pocket law oooo legal advice lawyer s group join the army of your choice canada sweden political asylum 8 steal now pay never oooo shoplifting techniques on the job credit cards 9 monkey welfare 10 piece now oooooo handguns rifles shotguns other weapons training gun laws 11 the underground identification papers communication liberate o o · 1 fuck new york 2 fuck chicago 3 fuck los angeles 4 fuck san francisco introduction

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it s perhaps fitting that i write this introduction in jail that graduate school of survival here you learn how to use toothpaste as glue fashion a shiv out of a spoon and build intricate communication networks here too you learn the only rehabilitation possible-hatred of oppression steal this book is in a way a manual of survival in the prison that is amerika it preaches jailbreak it shows you where exactly how to place the dynamite that will destroy the walls the first section-survive lays out a potential action program for our new nation the chapter headings spell out the demands for a free society a community where the technology produces goods and services for whoever needs them come who may it calls on the robin hoods of santa barbara forest to steal from the robber barons who own the castles of capitalism it implies that the reader already is ideologically set in that he understands corporate feudalism as the only robbery worthy of being called crime for it is committed against the people as a whole whether the ways it describes to rip-off shit are legal or illegal is irrelevant the dictionary of law is written by the bosses of order our moral dictionary says no heisting from each other to steal from a brother or sister is evil to not steal from the institutions that are the pillars of the pig empire is equally immoral community within our nation chaos in theirs that is the message of survive we cannot survive without learning to fight and that is the lesson in the second section fight separates revolutionaries from outlaws the purpose of part two is not to fuck the system but destroy it the weapons are carefully chosen they are home-made in that they are designed for use in our unique electronic jungle here the uptown reviewer will find ample proof of our violent nature but again the dictionary of law fails us murder in a uniform is heroic in a costume it is a crime false advertisements win awards forgers end up in jail inflated prices guarantee large profits while shoplifters are punished politicians conspire to create police riots and the victims are convicted in the courts students are gunned down and then indicted by suburban grand juries as the trouble-makers a modern highly mechanized army travels 9,000 miles to commit genocide against a small nation of great vision and then accuses its people of aggression slumlords allow rats to maim children and then complain of violence in the streets everything is topsy-turvy if we internalize the language and imagery of the pigs we will forever be fucked let me illustrate the point amerika was built on the slaughter of a people that is its history for years we watched movie after movie that demonstrated the white man s benevolence jimmy stewart the epitome of fairness puts his arm around cochise and tells how the indians and the whites can live in peace if only both sides will be reasonable responsible and rational the three r s imperialists always teach the natives you will find good grazing land on the other side of the mountain drawls the public relations man take your people and go in peace cochise as well as millions of youngsters in the balcony of learning were being dealt off the bottom of the deck the indians should have offed jimmy stewart in every picture and we should have cheered

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ourselves hoarse until we understand the nature of institutional violence and how it manipulates values and mores to maintain the power of the few we will forever be imprisoned in the caves of ignorance when we conclude that bank robbers rather than bankers should be the trustees of the universities then we begin to think clearly when we see the army mathematics research and development center and the bank of amerika as cesspools of violence filling the minds of our young with hatred turning one against another then we begin to think revolutionary be clever using section two clever as a snake dig the spirit of the struggle don t get hung up on a sacrifice trip revolution is not about suicide it is about life with your fingers probe the holiness of your body and see that it was meant to live your body is just one in a mass of cuddly humanity become an internationalist and learn to respect all life make war on machines and in particular the sterile machines of corporate death and the robots that guard them the duty of a revolutionary is to make love and that means staying alive and free that doesn t allow for cop-outs smoking dope and hanging up che s picture is no more a commitment than drinking milk and collecting postage stamps a revolution in consciousness is an empty high without a revolution in the distribution of power we are not interested in the greening of amerika except for the grass that will cover its grave section three liberate concerns itself with efforts to free stuff or at least make it cheap in four cities sort of a quick u.s on no dollars a day it begins to scratch the potential for a national effort in this area since we are a nation of gypsies dope on how to move around and dig in anywhere is always needed together we can expand this section it is far from complete as is the entire project incomplete chapters on how to identify police agents steal a car run day-care centers conduct your own trial organize a g.i coffee house start a rock and roll band and make neat clothes are scattered all over the floor of the cell the book as it now stands was completed in the late summer of 1970 for three months manuscripts made the rounds of every major publisher in all over 30 rejections occurred before the decision to publish the book ourselves was made or rather made for us perhaps no other book in modern times presented such a dilemma everyone agreed the book would be a commercial success but even greed had its limits and the irs and fbi following the manuscript with their little jive rap had a telling effect thirty yeses become thirty noes after thinking it over liberals who supposedly led the fight against censorship talked of how the book will end free speech finally the day we were bringing the proofs to the printer grove consented to act as distributor to pull a total solo trip including distribution would have been neat but such an effort would be doomed from the start we had tried it before and blew it in fact if anyone is interested in 4,000 1969 yippie calendars they ve got a deal even with a distributor joining the fight the battle will only begin when the books come off the press there is a saying that freedom of the

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press belongs to those who own one in past eras this was probably the case but now high speed methods of typesetting offset printing and a host of other developments have made substantial reductions in printing costs literally anyone is free to print their own works in even the most repressive society imaginable you can get away with some form of private publishing because amerika allows this does not make it the democracy jefferson envisioned repressive tolerance is a real phenomenon to talk of true freedom of the press we must talk of the availability of the channels of communication that are designed to reach the entire population or at least that segment of the population that might participate in such a dialogue freedom of the press belongs to those that own the distribution system perhaps that has always been the case but in a mass society where nearly everyone is instantaneously plugged into a variety of national communications systems wide-spread dissemination of the information is the crux of the matter to make the claim that the right to print your own book means freedom of the press is to completely misunderstand the nature of a mass society it is like making the claim that anyone with a pushcart can challenge safeway supermarkets or that any child can grow up to be president state legislators librarians pta members fbi agents church-goers and parents a veritable legion of decency and order already is on the march to get the book to you might be the biggest challenge we face the next few months should prove really exciting obviously such a project as steal this book could not have been carried out alone izak haber shared the vision from the beginning he did months of valuable research and contributed many of the survival techniques carole ramer and gus reichbach of the new york law commune guided the book through its many stages anna kaufman moon did almost all the photographs the cartoonists who have made contributions include ski williamson and gilbert sheldon tom forcade of the ups patiently did the editing bert cohen of concert hall did the book s graphic design amber and john wilcox set the type anita hoffman and lynn borman helped me rewrite a number of sections there are others who participated in the testing of many of the techniques demonstrated in the following pages and for obvious reasons have to remain anonymous there were perhaps over 50 brothers and sisters who played particularly vital roles in the grand conspiracy some of the many others are listed on the following page we hope to keep the information up to date if you have comments law suits suggestions or death threats please send them to dear abbie p.0 box 213 cooper station new york ny 10003 many of the tips might not work in your area some might be obsolete by the time you get to try them out and many addresses and phone numbers might be changed if the reader becomes a participating researcher then we will have achieved our purpose watch for a special edition called steal this white house complete with blueprints of underground passages methods of jamming the communications

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network and a detailed map of the celebrated room where according to tricia nixon daddy loves to listen to mantovanni records turn up the air conditioner full blast sit by the fireplace gaze out the window to the washington monument and meditate on those difficult problems that face all the peoples of this world december 1970 cook county jail chicago free speech is the right to shout theater in a crowded fire a yippie proverb aiding and abetting tim leary tom geronimo pearl paperhanger sonny pat solomon allan katzman jacob kohn nguyen van troi susan marty andy ami marshall bloom viva ben oanh robin palmer mom and dad janie fonda jerry denis lns bernadine dohrn a wall in harvard square nancy an anonymous stewardess shirley wonderful roz gumbo janis jimi dylan liberation front jeannie god slick john david rusty barney richard denny ron cobb the entire viet cong sam shephard ma bell eric david joe kim agnew the partridge family carol alan ginsburg woman s lib julius lester lenny bruce hack billy paul willy colleen sid johnny appleseed the rat craig che willie sutton wanda evo jeff crazy horse huey casey bobby alice mao rip ed bob gay liberation front wpax frank dudock manny mungo lottie rosemary marshall rennie judy jennifer mr martin keith madame binh mike eleanor dr spock afeni candice the tupamaros berkeley tribe gilbert sheldon stanley kubrick sam anna skip williamson ups andy stapp the yippies richard brautigan jano carlos marighella the weathermen julius jennings hoffman quentin the inmates of tier a-l cook county jail houdini 37 rosa luxemberg the kent 25 the chicago 15 the new york 21 the motor city 3 the indianapolis 500 jack joan malcolm x mayakovsky dotson r crumb daniel clyne justin the fbi top 10 now 16 unis dana jim morrison brian john gus ruth nancy unger pun jomo peter mark rudd billy kunstler genie ken the law commune paula robby terry dianna angela ted phil jefferson airplane len tricky prickers the berrigans stu rayanne j.b jonathan jackson the armstrong brothers homer sharon fred hampton jean jacques lebel a h maslow hanoi rose sylvia fellini amaru ann fettamen artaud bert merrill lynne and last but not least to spiro what s his name who provided the incentive.

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survive free food restaurants in a country such as amerika there is bound to be a hell-of-a-lot food lying around just waiting to be ripped off if you want to live high off the hog without

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having to do the dishes restaurants are easy pickings in general many of these targets are easier marks if you are wearing the correct uniform you should always have one suit or fashionable dress outfit hanging in the closet for the proper heists specialized uniforms such as nun and priest garb can be most helpful check out your local uniform store for a wide range of clothes that will get you in and especially out of all kinds of stores every movement organization should have a prop and costume department in every major city there are usually bars that cater to the new generation type riff-raff trying to hustle their way up the escalator of big business many of these bars have a buffet or hors-d oeuvres served free as a come-on to drink more mindless booze take a half-empty glass from a table and use it as a prop to ward off the anxious waitress walk around sampling the free food until you ve had enough often there are five or six such bars in close proximity so moving around can produce a delightful street smorgasbord dinner usually begins at 5:00 pm if you are really hungry you can go into a self-service cafeteria and finish the meal of someone who left a lot on the plate self-service restaurants are usually good places to cop things like mustard ketchup salt sugar toilet paper silverware and cups for home use bring an empty school bag and load up after you ve cased the joint also if you can stomach the food you can use slugs at the automat finishing leftovers can be worked in even the fanciest of restaurants when you are seated at a place where the dishes still remain chowdown real quick then after the waitress hands you the menu say you have to meet someone outside first and leave there are still some places where you can get all you can eat for a fixed price the best of these places are in las vegas sew a plastic bag onto your tee-shirt or belt and wear a loose-fitting jacket or coat to cover any noticeable bulge fried chicken is the best and the easiest to pocket or should we say bag another trick is to pour your second free cup of hot coffee into the plastic bag sewed inside your pocket and take it with you at large take-out stands you can say you or your brother just picked up an order of fifteen hamburgers or a bucket of chicken and got shorted we have never seen or heard of anybody getting turned down using this method if you want to get into a grand food heist from take-out stands you can work the following nervy bit from a pay phone place an order from a large delivery restaurant have the order sent to a nearby apartment house wait a few minutes in the booth after you ve hung up as they sometimes call back to confirm the order when the delivery man goes into the apartment house to deliver the order you can swipe the remaining orders that are still in his truck in fancy sit-down restaurants you can order a large meal and halfway through the main course take a little dead cockroach or a piece of glass out of your

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pocket and place it deftly on the plate jump up astonished and summon the headwaiter never have i been so insulted i could have been poisoned you scream slapping down the napkin you can refuse to pay and leave or let the waiter talk you into having a brand new meal on the house for this terrible inconvenience in restaurants where you pay at the door just before leaving there are a number of free-loading tricks that can be utilized after you ve eaten a full meal and gotten the check go into the restroom when you come out go to the counter or another section of the restaurant and order coffee and pie now you have two bills simply pay the cheaper one when you leave the place this can be worked with a friend in the following way sit next to each other at the counter he should order a big meal and you a cup of coffee pretend you don t know each other when he leaves he takes your check and leaves the one for the large meal on the counter after he has paid the cashier and left the restaurant you pick up the large check and then go into the astonishment routine complaining that somebody took the wrong check you end up only paying for your coffee later meet your partner and reverse the roles in another place in all these methods you should leave a good tip for the waiter or waitress especially with the roach-in-the-plate gambit you should try to avoid getting the employees in trouble or screwing them out of a tip one fantastic method of not only getting free food but getting the best available is the following technique that can be used in metropolitan areas look in a large magazine shop for gourmet digests and tourist manuals swipe one or two and copy down a good name from the masthead inside the cover making up a name can also work next invest $5.00 to print business cards with the name of the magazine and the new associate editor call or simply drop into a fancy restaurant show a copy of the magazine and present the manager with your card they will insist that the meal be on the house great places to get fantastic meals are weddings bar-mitzvahs testimonials and the like the newspaper society sections have lists of weddings and locations if your city has a large jewish population subscribe to the newspaper that services the jewish community there are extensive lists in these papers of family occasions where tons of good food is served show up at the back of the synagogue a few hours after the affair has begun with a story of how you d like to bring some leftovers of good jewish food back to your fraternity or sorority if you want to get the food served to you out front you naturally have to disguise yourself to look straight remarks such as i m marvin s cousin or learning the bride s name gee dorothy looks marvelous are great lines like betty doesn t look pregnant are frowned upon a man and woman team can work this freeload much better than a single person as they can chatter back and forth while stuffing themselves.

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if you re really into a classy free meal and you are in a city with a large harbor check out the passenger ship section in the back pages of the newspaper there you find the schedule of departures for ocean cruises most trips these kind anyway begin with a fantastic bon voyage party on board ship just walk on a few hours before departure time and start swinging champagne caviar lobster shrimp and more all as free as the open seas if you get really bombed and miss getting off you can also wiggle a ride across the ocean you get sent back as soon as you hit the other side but it s a free ocean cruise you should have a pretty good story ready to go or you might end up rowing in the galley another possibility for getting a free meal is to go down to the docks and get friendly with a sailor he can often invite you for dinner on board ship foreign sailors are more than glad to meet friends and you can get great foreign dinners this way food programs in amerika there is a national food stamp program that unfortunately is controlled by the states many states for racist reasons do not want to make it too available or to publicize the fact that it even exists it is a much better deal than the food program connected with welfare because you can use the stamps to buy any kind of food the only items excluded are tobacco products and alcoholic beverages in general you can qualify if you earn less than $165 per month the less you earn the more stamps you can receive there is minimal hassle involved once you get by the first hurdle show up at your local food stamp office which can be found by calling the welfare department in our city make an appointment to see a representative for your area they will tell you to bring all sorts of receipts but the only thing you need are a few rent stubs for the most recent months an array of various receipt books is a nice supplement to one s prop room if the receipts are for a high rent tell them you rent a room from a group of people and eat separately they really only want to prove that you have cooking facilities once you get the stamps you can pick them up regularly some states even mail them to your pad you can get up to a hundred dollars worth of free purchases a month per person in the most liberal states large amounts of highly nutritional food can be gotten for as little as three cents per meal from a non-profit organization called multi-purpose food for millions foundation inc 1800 olympic ave santa monica california write and they will send you details supermarkets talking about food in amerika means talking about supermarkets-mammoth neon lighted streets of food packaged to hoodwink the consumers many a yippie can be found in the aisles stuffing his pockets with assorted delicacies.

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we have been shoplifting from supermarkets on a regular basis without raising the slightest suspicion ever since they began we are not alone and the fact that so much stealing goes on and the supermarkets still bring in huge profits shows exactly how much overcharging has occurred in the first place supermarkets like other businesses refer to shoplifting as inventory shrinkage it s as if we thieves were helping big business reduce weight so let s view our efforts as methods designed to trim the economy and push forward with a positive attitude.

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women should never go shopping without a large handbag in those crowded aisles especially the ones with piles of cases all sorts of goodies can be transferred from shopping cart to handbag a drop bag can be sewn inside a trench coat for more efficient thievery don t worry about the mirrors attendants never look at them become a discriminating shopper and don t stuff any of the cheap shit in your pockets small bottles and jars often have the same size cap as the larger expensive sizes if they have the price stamped on the cap switch caps getting the larger size for the cheaper price you can empty a pound box of margarine and fill it with sticks of butter small narrow items can be hidden in the middle of rolls of toilet paper larger supermarkets sell records you can sneak two good lp s into one of those large frozen pizza boxes in the produce department there are bags for fruit and vegetables slip a few steaks or some lamb chops into the bottom of a large brown bag and pile some potatoes on top have a little man in the white coat weigh the bag staple it and mark the price with a black crayon you can mark your own prices or bring your own adhesive price tags it s best to work shoplifting in the supermarket with a partner who can act as lookout and shield you from the eyes of nosy employees shoppers and other crooks trying to pick up some pointers work out a prearranged set of signals with your partner diversions like knocking over displays getting into fist fights with the manager breaking plate glass windows and such are effective and even if you don t get anything they re fun haven t you always wanted to knock over those carefully constructed nine-foot pyramids of garbage you can walk into a supermarket get a few items from the shelves and walk around eating food in the aisles pick up some cherries and eat them have a spoon in your pocket and open some yogurt open a pickle or olive jar get some sliced meat or cheese from the delicatessen counter and eat it up making sure to ditch the wrapper the cart full of items used as a decoy can just be left in an aisle before you leave the store case the joint before pulling a big rip-off know the least crowded hours learn the best aisles to be busy in and check out the store s security system once you get into shoplifting in supermarkets you ll really dig it you ll be surprised to learn that the food tastes better large scale thievery can best be carried out with the help of an employee two ways we know of work best a woman can get a job as a cashier and ring up a small bill as her brothers and sisters bring home tons of stuff the method for men involves getting a job loading and unloading trucks in the receiving department some accomplices dressed right can just pull in and with your help load up on a few cases infiltrating an employee into a store is probably the best way to steal cashiers sales clerks shippers and the like are

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