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emotional capitalists the new leaders essential strategies for building your emotional intelligence and leadership success martyn newman

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this edition published in the uk in 2008 by john wiley sons ltd the atrium southern gate chichester west sussex po19 8sq england telephone 44 1243 779777 email for orders and customer service enquiries cs-books@wiley.co.uk visit our home page on www.wiley.com under the jossey-bass imprint jossey-bass 989 market street san fransisco ca 94103-1741 usa www.jossey-bass.com first published in 2007 by john wiley sons australia ltd and reprinted in march 2008 copyright © 2007 by martyn newman all rights reserved no part of this publication may be reproduced stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic mechanical photocopying recording scanning or otherwise except under the terms of the copyright designs and patents act 1988 or under the terms of a licence issued by the copyright licensing agency ltd 90 tottenham court road london w1t 4lp uk without the permission in writing of the publisher requests to the publisher should be addressed to the permissions department john wiley sons ltd the atrium southern gate chichester west sussex po19 8sq england or emailed to permreq@wiley.co.uk or faxed to 44 1243 770620 designations used by companies to distinguish their products are often claimed as trademarks all brand names and product names used in this book are trade names service marks trademarks or registered trademarks of their respective owners the publisher is not associated with any product or vendor mentioned in this book the material in this publication is of the nature of general comment only and neither purports nor intends to be advice readers should not act on the basis of any matter in this publication without considering and if appropriate taking professional advice with due regard to their own particular circumstances the author and publisher expressly disclaim all and any liability to any person whether a purchaser of this publication or not in respect of anything and of the consequences of anything done or omitted to be done by any such person in reliance whether in whole or part upon the whole or any part of the contents of this publication martyn newman has asserted his right under the copyright designs and patents act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work other wiley editorial offices john wiley sons inc 111 river street hoboken nj 07030 usa jossey-bass 989 market street san francisco ca 94103-1741 usa wiley-vch verlag gmbh boschstr 12 d-69469 weinheim germany john wiley sons australia ltd 42 mcdougall street milton queensland 4064 australia john wiley sons asia pte ltd 2 clementi loop #02-01 jin xing distripark singapore 129809 john wiley sons canada ltd 6045 freemont blvd mississauga ontario canada l5r 4j3 wiley also publishes its books in a variety of electronic formats some content that appears in print may not be available in electronic books british library cataloguing in publication data a catalogue record for this book is available from the british library isbn 978-0-470-69421-3 pb this edition typeset by laserwords private ltd chennai india printed and bound in great britain by t.j international ltd padstow cornwall.

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to stacey dylan and scott three remarkably intelligent young leaders

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contents foreword vii xi xiii 1 27 53 89 111 129 about the author 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 introduction self-reliance assertiveness optimism 71 acknowledgements self-actualisation self-confidence empathy 147 173 relationship skills conclusion 175 187 193 appendix notes index

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foreword in this new millennium executives either manage people well or fail technical skills the bricks and mortar of the past century are no longer sufficient and the light is fading on the days when `command and control leadership was anything more than a temporary freeze as a journalist i am regularly told that the best new recruits are the ones doing their own interviewing they are not settling for just any old corporate offering they want a business to believe in with real leadership and it turns out that the mark of leaders who can sustainably manage their teams and themselves is their emotional intelligence vii

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emotional capitalists the new leaders intuitive executives know this much that a real ability to listen to empathise and to be assertive without being aggressive is vital they know the bar has been raised skilled leaders read situations with clarity and act with independence decisiveness and grace but where does one learn such skills until now the ability some people have to deal with life and its challenges with apparent ease seemed to be one of those insoluble mysteries you either had it or you missed out there appeared to be no rule book the people who `made it in business weren t consistently the best looking the most outgoing or had the highest iq although having none of these attributes seemed to hurt the factors that gave a winner `star quality appeared intangible and not reducible to skills amenable to being acquired and practiced rigorous analysis has lifted that veil and now it seems everyone can be in on the game martyn newman is a consulting psychologist whose work with individuals and across companies has led him to some startling observations about human behaviour and about how people can change in this book newman challenges the notion that success is limited by birthright and offers contemporary business leaders a toolbox for personal investment in a new type of capital their emotions more than a catch-cry what this book also offers is rigour many commentators grabbed the concept of emotional intelligence from daniel goleman in the 1990s and ran with it few realised goleman s work had a substantial underpinning in the pioneering work of israeli psychologist reuven bar-on it was bar-on s work in the 1970s on emotional intelligence that goleman popularised daniel goleman convinced us that emotional skills were vital martyn newman tells us clearly how viii

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foreword to build them he has written an accessible text for developing the reader s own skills his narrative accounts are built not only on his own international experience but stand on both goleman s and bar-on s substantial foundation of evidence from hundreds of thousands of assessments across careers countries and continents and newman s good news is that you can unlearn bad habits and take on a whole new set of skills and behaviours that will boost your success at work and beyond bill pheasant senior journalist the australian financial review melbourne australia ix

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about the author martyn newman phd dpsych is a consulting psychologist with an international reputation as an expert in emotional intelligence and leadership as well as holding senior positions at leading universities in europe and australia he has had many years of experience working in leadership development and management consulting across europe and asia martyn has assisted many leading companies to improve the performance of their people and organisation he is coauthor of the emotional capital inventory and author of the emotional intelligence sports inventory eqsi the world s first eq assessment of elite sports performance xi

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emotional capitalists the new leaders he received his phd from the university of sydney and holds an ma from the university of california berkeley a master of psychology from monash university melbourne and a doctor of psychology from la trobe university melbourne martyn is a captivating keynote speaker on the power of building emotional intelligence in the workplace he spends much of his time between melbourne and london xii

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acknowledgements this book represents a decade of work on the ideas and practices that have culminated in the theory of emotional capital and new leadership i have written this book largely in response to the constant prompting over the last decade by my clients who have asked me to write down the key ideas they have found so powerful in their personal and professional leadership roles i am indebted to many who have contributed to my thinking research and practice thank you to philip greenway my friend and mentor who unwittingly provided the first inspiration for the book philip s understanding of the nature of what it means to be a human being and how relationships work best in the real world is nothing short of astonishing a number of the strategies described in this book have at least their origins in long conversations with philip i would also like to acknowledge xiii

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