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life and laughter november ­ december 2010 newsstand price cdn $4.95

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walking with you the king s men study guides walking with the master shoulder to shoulder the king s men is a series of discussions studies and activities that will engage men in a life of freedom risk sacrifice and significance mission to ignite and equip men to become fully devoted followers of jesus christ ­ resulting in homes churches workplaces communities and nations impacted and shaped by the grace of god through the lives of men using the 7 promises of a promise keeper men will journey through the life of jesus and discover how he prepared his followers to be men the world would describe as those who turned the world upside down acts 17:6 these small group resources will help you and your men s group continue where the conference left off visit www.promisekeepers.ca promise keepers canada can do for you and your church discipleship training unleashed a weekend retreat where you can experience in-depth training to discover how to become a better equipped godly man for more information on what resources sent to your home seven magazine men of integrity devotional and world class speakers relevant biblical resources for your daily walk.

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contents september ­ october 2010 on the cover 14­23 the entertainment issue publisher brian koldyk managing editor doug koop pulse editor robert white associate editor jerrad peters life is full of entertainment and diversions of many sorts but it s possible to get too much of a good thing learn to have lots of fun and set good boundaries features 14 life and laughter what s so funny about humour 17 advertising account executives william leighton william@christianweek.org darrell friesen darrell@christianweek.org jim hicks jhicks@christianweek.org unless otherwise indicated neither christianweek nor promise keepers canada guarantee warrant or endorse any product program or service advertised entertainment what s a man to do funny man phil callaway offers advice on how to keep entertainment in its place editorial advisory board kirk giles promise keepers canada jeff stearns promise keepers canada phil wagler gracepoint community church sandra reimer reimer reason communications doug koop christianweek distributed by 2o meet the entertainers it takes all kinds to make a world 22 football wives drafted or shafted it s hard to get into the game when your wife is blowing the whistle 24 joseph the dad who was there the surrogate father of the son of god is a great model for fathers to follow promise keepers canada 1295 north service road po box 40599 burlington on l7p 4w1 905 331-1830 subscriptions@promisekeepers.ca postmaster please send address changes to po box 40599 burlington on l7p 4w1 issn 1916-8403 cover illustration jeff lowell columns 5 pk podium promise keepers canada celebrates 15 years 6 sex talk check your entertainment priorities 26 money matters give more to spend less 27 out of my depth surprised by laughter 30 what women want the curse of great expectations departments 8-12 pulse curious events interesting people good ideas 13 reviews be real be active 28 power play tools toys technology editorial and advertising office 204-424 logan avenue winnipeg mb r3a 0r4 phone 204 982-2060 800 263-6695 admin@christianweek.org dkoop@christianweek.org design indigo ink studios www.indigoinkstudios.com seven is a christian magazine for canadian men that exists to help men lead more fulfilling lives and leave enduring legacies the name reflects the seven promises that form the basis of the promise keepers organization which works with churches to minister to men across canada one ­ a promise keeper is committed to honouring jesus christ through worship prayer and obedience to god s word in the power of the holy spirit two ­ a promise keeper is committed to pursuing vital relationships with a few other men understanding that he needs brothers to help him keep his promises three ­ a promise keeper is committed to practising spiritual moral ethical and sexual purity four ­ a promise keeper is committed to building strong marriages and families through love protection and biblical values five ­ a promise keeper is committed to supporting the mission of the church by honouring and praying for his pastor and by actively giving his time and resources six ­ a promise keeper is committed to reaching beyond any racial and denominational barriers to demonstrate the power of biblical unity seven ­ a promise keeper is committed to influencing his world being obedient to the great commandment see mark 12:30-31 and the great commission see matt 28:19-20 seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 3

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pk podium god digs deep promise keepers canada celebrates 15 years of ministry by kirk giles fifteen years ago i sat in the fourth row at queensway cathedral in toronto ontario for an event that would mark the beginning of a remarkable journey on that night the ministry of promise keepers canada was inaugurated as the first international expansion of the ministry that was exploding across the united states i was a wide-eyed 20-something-yearold guy who was in awe of everything that was going on around me little did i know at the time just how connected my life would become with the ministry of promise keepers canada there were several men in canada who had a vision to see ministry to men take place across this nation these men sacrificed so much time energy and finances to see it become a reality early events in red deer vancouver and hamilton were huge successes with thousands of men attending in 1996 i had the privilege of joining the staff of pk canada as a part-time administrative assistant the ministry would face some very difficult times during the late 1990s as the momentum in the united states slowed down and as the canadian ministry tried to create its own identity and financial base at one point we were essentially bankrupt and had no idea where funding would come from i remember sitting in an arena in saskatoon and wondering if we were at the end then i heard someone announce on our staff radios that an individual had made a sizeable donation there was hope for another day after a couple of years of wandering in the wilderness financially another partner stepped up and essentially covered all of our outstanding debt allowing the ministry a fresh start praise god we have never had to face that kind of situation since that time the one thing that has been undeniable over the 15 years of the ministry is the deep work god has done in thousands of men s lives across the nation everywhere i travel in canada i encounter men and women who tell me stories of how god has used pk canada in powerful ways to encourage and shape their lives today we are grateful for those who invest in this ministry and in the lives of men across the nation we are growing and have vision for the future this year the theme of our conferences is legacy when i think about the legacy of pk canada in the first 15 years i see the impact in thousands of men when i think about the legacy of pk canada over the next 15 years i pray that we will see the godly impact in all areas of our society with more than a million men becoming fully committed to following jesus christ i am so grateful for the faithful men over the past 15 years who have made it possible for pk canada to be where it is today and i pray that we will honour their legacy and god s faithfulness by faithfully walking with the men of canada to make a godly impact in the world kirk giles is president of promise keepers canada he and shannon have been married for 15 years they are the parents of four children ages 7-14 seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 5

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sex talk check your entertainment priorities relationships will flourish when you put careful thought into leisure time by doug weiss clearly x-rated and unrated movies are not okay to watch but there has to be somewhere to draw the line other than at disney cartoons if i am comfortable watching it with my wife does that seem like a good guideline as a couple you will have to create guidelines for your overall entertainment you and your spouse can decide the boundaries for sexual comments sexual situations partial nudity nudity and sex scenes that movies offer i use the guidelines of the 10th commandment not to lust after your neighbour s wife so if it s going to cause you to lust consult god for guidelines horror is another boundary some movies are designed to create fear anxiety or just plain horror movies including more than a set number of killings should be examined as acceptable entertainment there isn t a right or wrong here and each couple will be different as to what is over the line each person s spirit may be sensitive to different things my wife and i have a clearplay dvd player that electronically takes out profanity sexuality and gross violence for any of our home movies this is a great tool www.clearplay.com if you re going out on a date check the movie reviews at pluggedinonline.com they review movies from a christian perspective and provide detailed information including scenes to be aware of having entertainment boundaries is really helpful in the bible lot vexed his righteous soul by hearing and seeing unrighteous things we do need to be aware of what sort of fruit the world s entertainment produces my wife complains if i am on the computer at night and complains if i bring the laptop over to watch tv her shows are boring and i am trying to compromise how can i make her see the balance you bring up a really good question here how much entertainment do you really need do you need two to five hours a day or 30 hours a week as a christian really talk this through if all you do is sit in front of a screen be it a computer television dvd or computer games you re in serious trouble i find couples that clearly define how many hours they need to be entertained and stick with this plan have better marriages and families intimacy takes time and creativity have game nights date nights and exercise together when you are in front of the screen you are as close to being asleep as you can be with your eyes open create nights of serving others seeing family or just going to the gym together with your wife and children you can bring your relationship into balance by creating clear days or time limits for entertainment so you can talk play games do things around the house walk the dog or just keep your car clean as the man lead by example showing that god family and life have value protect yourself and your family from an out of balance view of entertainment i want to date my wife but it just doesn t ever seem to happen what could i do this is a common problem in marriage it s so easy to get too busy especially when you have children there are so many demands however you did not promise to love honour or cherish these demands dating is important to keep your marriage healthy and both of you sane if money is an issue find another safe couple and rotate watching each other s children so you can both save on the childcare decide together on a maximum to spend per date or on a monthly basis dates can become costly so come up with a budget so you don t have to be concerned about money while you are on the date i suggest to couples that they rotate who picks what they do on a date on her date she decides what to do where to go and the object is for her to have a good time you are her guest a happy guest not a sulky guest then it s your turn you decide and she is your guest on your date remember these three things 1 dating is not running errands that s not a date that is running errands 2 a date is not shopping unless both of you agree to this 3 dates are not therapy sessions you do not discuss problems on dates if someone brings up a problem agree to talk about it the next day if you are self-employed avoid talking shop on the date you and your wife deserve to date as i tell people at marriage conferences if you don t date you ll eventually see a counsellor so date it s more fun my wife won t go to a shoot `em up movie with me how do i change this in marriage you don t always get what you want your wife doesn t always get what she wants either and that s actually a good thing a marriage isn t supposed to meet all of our needs i m sure your wife wants you to cry at some of the chick flicks she drags you to that s why it is perfectly okay to have some guy friends and go together to the guy movies you like go pig out watch a shoot `em up movie and have a blast don t drag your wife into that with you if she doesn t want to go also make sure she has a girl s night out so she can enjoy her tears with someone another woman who really gets why she is crying it s totally healthy and fun to be surrounded by the same gender and enjoy some of life outside of your marriage within balance if you re not dating your wife but finding time for the guys your priorities are off lisa and i will sometimes sit through movie previews and see a stereotypical guy or girl flick advertised and laugh not that one this lets us know to take a friend or one of the children to that particular show so enjoy her differences respect her boundaries and celebrate with the guys seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 6 douglas weiss ph.d is a licensed psychologist and executive director of heart to heart counseling center in colorado springs co he has appeared on oprah dr phil and many other national media appearances contact him by email at heart2heart@xc.org or visit his website at www.drdougweiss.com.

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seven have visit magazine sent to your home www.promisekeepers.ca to receive the next issue.

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pulse curiousities personalities ideas information by robert white pulse editor how to avoid looking silly in public in a recent blog talking to the dead author bonnie grove reminded readers social networking isn t a casual affair social networking has many functions but you must always keep in mind that your online presence is a living resumé a real time curriculum vitae while grove was specifically talking to writers her tips on handling social networking apply to any business situation abbreviated and used with permission from http novelmatters.blogspot.com/2010/07/how-to-avoidlooking-silly-in-public.html passwords and pins overload memory a pox on passwords and pins just thinking about how many of the secret log-in codes you need to navigate through life these days is enough to bring on a brain cramp there s your debit card pin your credit card pin if you ve got a newer card with an embedded security chip your log-in for your work e-mail your log-in for your home e-mail the codes to retrieve voicemail at home and at work if you are a social media type you need a password to get onto facebook linkedin and twitter if you book frequent flyer rewards online you need one there too oh and there s your password for online or telephone banking the password to get into your office or to get from your underground garage to your apartment the pin for your home security alarm most of us probably have our stock password but it doesn t work everywhere says gary small director of the memory and aging research center at the university of california los angeles so then you have your amended stock password and it may not work and then you can t remember is it your amended of your amended stock password or what was it 1 develop an inner circle of people you turn to when you feel insecure angry betrayed or otherwise upset about your job these are the people you need to lean on and vent to not the public 2 validation is an illusion stop running after it when we need to be validated by an increasingly far-flung group of people we devalue the rock solid affection and support of our inner circle 3 stop talking about yourself all the time social networking has created a new self-paradigm where it s acceptable to talk about yourself all day long facebook wants you to post how you re feeling twitter wants us to post our micro-moments talking about yourself all day creates an unhealthy filter by which you begin to view the world as orbiting around you 4 nothing matters more than your job we can talk all day about our work about people s reactions to our work but if we focus our energy on talking about it the quality of our work will suffer over time 5 know where you re going and keep moving toward that goal hockey-obsessed canadians have a saying keep your stick on the ice it means stay in the game stay focused and be ready develop a strong goal and work toward it don t be seduced into thinking your public rants on facebook won t affect a boss decision seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 8

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we re all struggling with it and there are so many sites and so many passwords in the old days it was just my combination lock at the gym that s all i had to remember says small author of book ibrain surviving the technological alteration of the modern mind security experts might have their own ideas but people who specialize in memory and the way the brain works suggest that if you can choose a password or a pin choose something that has meaning to you what helps us with memory and that really gets to the crux of it what helps us remember things is when the information has meaning and it has a context says small one tip he suggests is having a pass phrase as opposed to a password a sentence like my dog is a black labrador reduces down to a password of mdiabl not as obvious as the name of the actual pet but still something you could remember a similar technique can work when you are assigned a password experts say if you personalize it figure out how it makes sense in the context of your life you re much less likely to forget it canadian press ashes to disc vinyl of course music lovers can now be immortalized when they die by having their ashes baked into vinyl records to leave behind for loved ones a uk company called and vinyly gives people the chance to press their ashes in a vinyl record of their own voice favourite music or last will and testament minimalist audiophiles might want to simply press the ashes into the vinyl to result in pops and crackles the company was founded by jason leach who co-founded the techno group and record label subhead in the 1990s leach explained to wired.co.uk there were a number of factors that made him launch the service including thinking that he was getting a bit old and might not be invincible his mother also started working for a funeral director which brought the whole funeral process closer to home a third prompt took place when he saw a television program about someone in the u.s who put their ashes into fireworks it made him think about how he might want to be remembered it s a bit more interesting than being in a pot on a shelf says leach seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 9

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pulse setting human ashes into vinyl involves a very understanding pressing plant the ashes must be sprinkled onto the raw piece of vinyl known as a biscuit or puck before it s pressed by the plates this means when the plates exert their pressure on the vinyl in order to create the grooves the ashes are pressed into the record leach s site http www.andvinyly.com has an irreverent style and operates under the motto live on from beyond the groove and vinyly also offers personalized riv rest in vinyl artwork the simple version just carries your name and your life span or you can have your portrait painted by an artist using your ashes mixed into the paint it s difficult to think of what to put on your record because you want it to be the best album you can imagine says leach i would definitely have a recording of my own voice as well as some `sound photos of places important to me and then i d have some of my own music on there it s something i m working on www.wired.co.uk are married which lessens the difference between them in the end the researchers concluded that testosterone was the only remaining dominant factor levi says he knows his data isn t driven by test tubes and biological samples and he s okay with that he hopes it might inspire a researcher to do something on a bigger scale one day the danger with something like this is to say it s not perfect research he says if you only look where the light is and don t look out in the dark areas you might not find the truth www.globeandmail.com heaven tops hell in canadian belief poll slightly more than half of canadians believe there s a heaven and less than a third believe there s a hell reported holy post the national post s religion blog in september that s one of the findings of a survey of 420 canadians probing their personal spirituality and attitudes toward formal religion we re not by and large a god-denying country says jack jedwab executive director with the montreal-based association for canadian studies the acs along with the carlton university survey centre compiled the survey jedwab noted just seven per cent of those surveyed were clear in their disbelief of an all-powerful deity who oversees the affairs of the world we do tend to believe in a higher power responding to the survey s main question about the existence of god about 30 per cent agreed with i know god really exists and i have no doubts nearly 12 per cent adopted the classic agnostic position i don t know whether there is a god and don t believe there is a way to find out jedwab says there isn t a common perception among canadians about how god is represented he also says the numbers suggest the country has a fairly high level of spiritual belief in despite ongoing secularization of society and declining participation in organized forms of worship big deal went sour blame the testosterone a chief executive officer s patience and cooperation can make or break a corporate merger or acquisition that s no secret but researchers at the university of british columbia s sauder school of business now offer a biological reason for male ceos willingness or lack thereof to negotiate testosterone levels the ubc team crunched the numbers for 350 corporate deals completed between 1997 and 2007 and determined the aggression-causing hormone directly affects a male ceo s tendency to bid for a company and walk away from an unfavourable deal normally assets should go to buyers that value [them the most finance professor and lead researcher maurice levi says if decisions are based purely on the basis of rationality his team found hormones intervene and make ceos bid for things they don t need or turn down offers out-of-hand without trying to negotiate better terms they might be pursuing things that give them the most dominance but don t give them the most value levi says men with higher testosterone levels are 20 per cent more likely to walk away from a takeover offer they re also four per cent more likely to make takeover bids a small effect but still statistically significant because the ubc researchers couldn t go back in time and study ceos testosterone levels at the time of actual deal making they used age as a proxy until a man hits 45 his testosterone levels remain fairly stable then drop off significantly the researchers didn t stop there admitting that age can affect decision-making for many reasons such as having more negotiation experience about 20 variables were accounted for researchers even addressed whether marriage which has been found to lower testosterone levels affects ceos decisions it wasn t an important factor because the vast majority of ceos seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 10

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atlantic canadians were the strongest believers 36.4 per cent while faith was less firm in western canada 34 per cent ontario 27.3 per cent and quebec 23.9 per cent respondents also showed concern about some negative aspects of religion about three out of four agreed with the statements religion breeds conflict and religious people are too intolerant jedwab says the findings show canadians are widely and strongly supportive of religious freedom at a personal level but when it s a group phenomenon that s where they re worried because they believe it can breed intolerance the results of the survey are considered accurate to within 4.8 percentage points 19 times out of 20 from beginning to end the bible contains 1,189 chapters so juby s final entry should be november 8 2013 juby says he started the project as a way to focus his mind on his daily bible readings he also hopes it encourages others to read the scriptures too the bible underpins so much of our culture people like shakespeare and dickens made casual references to what we would now regard as obscure passages of scripture says juby but people even christians don t tend to read the whole bible it s perhaps regarded as a bit of an oddball thing to do i hope in doing the summary it will inspire people to read the bible for themselves my summaries are no substitute for the real thing www.nationalpost.com british man puts the bible on twitter are you one of those guys who has always wanted to read the bible but has never been able to find the time have you given up trying to decipher that confounding king james english or is your attention span just too small to get through an entire book the answer to these problems can now be found on twitter chris juby a worship director from king s church in durham city england began a project to summarize the entire bible on the social networking site each day juby writes a summary of one chapter of the bible in 140 characters or less here s a sample entry from juby s bible summary twitter page gen6 humankind corrupted the earth with evil god decided to destroy them he told noah to build an ark to be saved from the flood business ministry splits into two christian business ministries canada cbmc and corpath started out serving two different groups of business leaders about eight years ago they combined forces to better serve those business leaders now cbmc and corpath have split up so they can return to what they do best individually there were two different products and it was causing confusion says corpath s john wiseman cbmc had more of an outreach culture seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 11

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while corpath focused on discipleship it was a struggle within the combined organization cbmc worked mainly through local teams championed by a local leader says board chair david braun over lunch or breakfast the business leader groups blg or city teams met and prayed about their `most wanted list the needs of the group relied on what the champion s plan was says braun the forums corpath s strength were brought on to allow business owners and senior-level executives a chance for some peer-to-peer sharing during five to six-hour meetings we knew there was a problem two years ago says wiseman and along with the brand confusion came the question of resources with a faltering economy the board decided to both reduce costs and increase revenue member input helped the board find out which program blgs city teams or forums gave members the best value for their money it was no surprise the forums expected a significantly different service and quality of support materials than the blg s and the traditional city teams says braun at its june meeting the board had to decide if it should keep being all things to all business people it decided it couldn t and created two separate ministries cbmc which will run blgs and city teams and corpath which will run the forums corpath is returning to where we were in 2004 says wiseman we feel it will enable us to more effectively serve our membership corpath has about 90 members across the country with the majority in alberta for braun one of a key success was creating two financially selfsustaining organizations out of one it was no small accomplishment but the board worked incredibly hard to do that says braun pastor trades pulpit for talk show an invitation to discuss mel gibson s the passion of the christ led greg glatz to a new career as a radio talk show host glatz now co-hosts the saturday and sunday 9 to 11 p.m slot with marlo boux on winnipeg s cjob it s not something i actively pursued says glatz who recently resigned after 17 years as a lead pastor at winnipeg s central baptist church but i like the medium and its ability to reach people david balzer and various co-hosts had been airing godtalk a faith-based show for several years on cjob balzer asked glatz to co-host and when balzer left the show glatz was asked to take over the spot instead of carrying on with godtalk s faith-based show glatz went to the station and asked to not just do religious topics i wanted to do anything from the perspective of a baptist preacher the station said `we love that it s what we want says glatz now with boux the self-titled weekend warriors bring their opinions on any subject and invite callers to do the same for example glatz launched a petition asking the city of winnipeg to rename the disraeli freeway a long expressway bridge over rail tracks and a depressed neighbourhood the bachman-turner overdrive in honour of the rock band with its origins in the city you find out quickly in talk radio if you have a good idea or bad idea says glatz who also serves as the program coordinator for the knowles-woodsworth centre for theology and public policy and partners with boux in crazy 8s creative we found it was a good idea and the listeners response was just as creative as the idea people really got it and it s people that interest glatz the best moments are often the on-air callers not the guests he says one caller in response to the roman catholic abuse story said on air `i realized i was abused by a priest as a kid and i had repressed that memory not dealt with it listening to the show made me realize why i never wanted to go to church not believe in god and not know why that was amazing recalls glatz photo courtesy of crazy 8s creative rock and roll preacher greg glatz with radio co-host marlo boux seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 12

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reviews be real be active the action bible god s redemptive story many of us grew up with the picture bible and are familiar with it it is the bible in comic book format it was cool was is the key word here it has become so dated that today s kids are not nearly so impressed comic fans will be glad to know there are new works on the scene my son became a fan of the new manga bible series each of the five books is created originally in japanese before the english edition is produced the first book manga messiah traces the four gospels in vivid manga style the newly released action bible is much closer to the style of the original picture bible with more than 200 fast paced narratives in chronological order the creators balance bold images with biblical text and each section references the biblical passage it is based on both the action bible and the manga messiah are great resources for parents or for the child in each of us dare to drop the pose by craig groeschel craig groeschel is best known as the pastor of a large church that also has a significant online presence www.lifechurch.tv as i read this book i felt like craig had stolen some of my thoughts and put them in a book for the world to read then i was encouraged to realize that i am not alone with these thoughts here are some examples based on chapters in this book i can t stand a lot of christians i have to work hard to stay sexually pure i worry almost all the time sometimes i doubt god these and the rest of the chapters in this book are incredibly encouraging and revealing craig uses great humour honesty and biblical teaching to help readers who are wrestling with these issues in their lives drop the pose is an excellent tool to move to the next level of being a man who desires to reveal the image of god to others do something by miles mcpherson to be honest the cover did not grab my attention and i had no intention of reading this book that is until i was trapped on a flight home and the in-flight movie screens died leaving me trapped for hours happily the book far exceeded my expectations it is practical engaging and full of additional features that go beyond the book each chapter highlights a different ministry opportunity through contemporary and biblical stories woven together not only does it provide suggested action steps but it links to online resources that go even further one of the best features is the do something myths exposing common myths like if i am scared to do something god must not want me to do it miles takes the time to show how these misconceptions are not biblical and prevent us from experiencing what god has prepared for us a great book seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 13

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features life and laughter what s so funny about humour by john allen illustrations by jeff lowell seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 14

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the boys who had a lifetime to live were laughing they were five-year-olds at the time sprawled on their backs on a sunsoaked lawn on a bright day with fits of giggles wracking their small bodies correct that it wasn t just giggles this was laughter of a deeper sort starting somewhere down in the gut and shaking their entire world they were utterly abandoned to mirth i ll never ever forget this as long as i live gasped one of them between guffaws it was hilarious whatever it was fifty years later the boy has no idea what he was laughing so heartily about yet the memory of the moment endures good humour creates lasting memories and produces delightful moments usually taking us somewhat by surprise cheerful laughter is almost always a sign of good company and why not it isn t strange that most of us enjoy good times and good feelings of course experiencing these moments is even better than remembering them healthy laughter is a telling expression of the joy of living and peace and joy are what we really want that helps to explain why it s often said that laughter is good for the soul and as a matter of fact laughter is good for quite a lot of things light moments reduce tensions and reduce the drudgery of daily labour a timely joke can make a meeting more productive laughter creates smiles and makes us feel better about ourselves or someone or something else most lessons go down easier when tinged with amusement what makes us laugh humour comes in countless forms here in north america irony ranks high in sense of the funny we chuckle at ironic questions like do you ever wonder why the man who invests all your money is called a broker we also find joy in discovering ambiguous messages in ordinary miscommunications how about the sign on the building for the family planning clinic that tells its clients to use the rear entrance a few of us hardy-har-har souls consider puns to be hilarious especially when we make them up ourselves and plunk them into regular conversation we re apt to point out that when you dream in colour it s a pigment of your imagination and then we will insist that the higher the volume of the groans it elicits the better the quality of a pun not everyone shares this sense of humour but just about everyone thinks it s funny when a person tumbles down the stairs or steps in dog poo it s always a hoot when some poor chap takes a blow to the goolies in those cases we re laughing out of a sense of subtle relief life is full ordinary misadventures that happen at some time or another to us all but this time the fates picked someone else ha ha ha it wasn t me there s nothing particularly malicious in that just a happy feeling that this time i was spared the consequences of another nasty thump from the powers propelling the cosmos this actually says something about the way life is bad strange and weird things do happen and seeing the comedy in the situation can help us to cope in extreme circumstances gallows humour and black humour find humour in unexpected places just imagine a man standing against the wall facing a firing squad declining the offer of a last cigarette no thanks he says i m trying to quit humour has a subversive way of surviving even thriving under stern circumstances citizens of the former soviet union during the communist regime for example were renowned for joking about their dismal lot in life question what is a soviet musical duet answer it s a musical quartet after a trip abroad splashes of comedy brightened the oppression that governed their lives touches of laughter lubed the grind of daily austerity embarrassed the north american experience of humour is usually less extreme most of us are embarrassed more frequently than we re executed to be the butt of a joke or the source of someone else s laugher is not a particularly comfortable place things that put us lightly on edge have a way of revealing or character for better and for worse suddenly it s my foible or folly that s being lampooned it s my fly that s open the kick me sign is taped to my back some days things happen that we seven ­ issue fifteen november­december 2010 page 15

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